We seldom praise anyone in good earnest, except such as admire us.
We seldom praise anyone in good earnest, except such as admire us.

We seldom praise anyone in good earnest, except such as admire us.

François de La Rochefoucauld

This quote reflects the human tendency to gravitate towards those who appreciate and validate us. Essentially, it suggests that our praise for others is often influenced by their admiration for us. This is because admiration from others can boost our self-esteem and make us feel valued, leading us to view those who admire us in a positive light and hence praise them genuinely.

This idea is deeply rooted in the psychological concept of reciprocity, which states that we tend to respond to a positive action with another positive action. When someone admires us, we instinctively want to return the favor, often in the form of praise. It’s a form of social exchange that helps to build and maintain relationships.

In today’s world, this idea is prevalent in various social contexts. For instance, in social media, we often see this dynamic play out where people are more likely to ‘like’ or comment positively on the posts of those who do the same for them. Similarly, in work environments, employees are likely to speak highly of those colleagues or superiors who appreciate their work or value their contribution.

In terms of personal development, understanding this concept can help us become more self-aware of our biases and motivations when praising others. It can encourage us to question whether our praise is genuine or influenced by the desire for reciprocation. This self-awareness can lead to more authentic interactions and relationships, as we strive to appreciate and praise others for their intrinsic qualities and actions, rather than their admiration for us.

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